Life & Living: Dressing for Myself



Hello lovely readers,

I have a bit of a personal post for you this afternoon as I’d love to share a bit more about me, learn a bit about all of you and get some discussion going!

How we dress sends out certain messages about ourselves to the outside world, not just about our own sense of style but also about our personalities, self-confidence and even our intentions.  Just think of the ultimate era of power dressing, the 1980s, where women used their clothes as a way of communicating to the outside world that they really did mean business!

Without question we use our choice of clothing and appearance to convey certain impressions: hence the reason we dress smartly for a job interview or may be more likely to leave the over-the-knee boots at home when meeting the boyfriend’s parents for the first time!

I know I certainly use my appearance to my advantage; if I’m feeling blue I tend to overcompensate by making a real effort with my make up and in my corporate job, I would always wear high heels if I knew I had a difficult meeting that day (nothing like towering over someone to give you a tactical advantage!).  In many ways, I use my clothes and make up in the outside world as armour to protect me and convey an image of a confident and assured woman.  Until recently, I would never dream of leaving the house without make up but a lazy Sunday at home would typically involve me lazing around in scruffy clothes, barefaced and with my hair scraped back (I know, my husband is a lucky man eh?!)

A Time For Reflection

All of this sort of changed at the start of this year when I got pretty sick and ended up being off work for two months, followed by two months of reduced hours working from home.  Obviously when I was very ill, I was lucky if I made it out of bed on a daily basis, let alone thought about what I was going to wear but since I’ve come back from our honeymoon and handed my notice in to the corporate world, I’ve been based from home every day and it’s got me to thinking….I dress for other people (I like to protect people from the horror of me without make up!) and I may dress to protect myself in outside situations but do I ever just dress for me?

Typically, my working from home look comprises: hair tied back, no make up, my ever-faithful hoodie and (big confession time) joggers.  Sure, I look a bit skanky but when I was doing this maybe one day a week, it was quite a welcome break from dressing smartly and was all about the comfort and staying warm.

For the past few months, this has become my Monday to Friday outfit (with a few variations - don’t worry, I’m still washing my clothes!) and I have to say I’ve found it a little depressing.  An occassional day of dressing for comfort is great but I discovered that my personal mood and motivation levels were being massively impacted by what I’m wearing.  I was feeling dowdy and unattractive and that was starting to impact my overall confidence levels…less than ideal when you’re starting a new venture!  So I decided it was time for a change and that I needed to start dressing for myself.

Learning To Dress For Myself

Now don’t get me wrong, I haven’t started wearing high heels around the house or a full face of make up purely for my own benefit but I have started to dress more smartly and take more of a concern about my appearance.  The joggers have been banished in favour of jeans or leggings matched with pretty tops, blouses and some cute T shirts.  I’m taking the time each morning to semi-style my hair so I don’t need to just scrape it back and most days I’m topping it off with my all-time-favourite accessory, the scarf.  A smart-casual if you will.  Given the weather we’ve been having, most days I find myself also wrapped up in a blanket by lunchtime but the difference it’s made to my motivation, drive and – without wishing to sound over dramatic – sense of self worth is immense.  I’m still comfortable as I work and I’m still saving my “best” clothes for the weekend (or you know, those days where I do actually leave the house!) but I’m also really starting to feel good about myself again.

Coco Chanel would be proud…

So what do you think lovely readers?  Are you one of those girls who just throws on whatever is closest to hand in the morning or do you carefully plan your look each day.  Do you find that how you dress impacts your mood and how you feel about yourself?  Don’t forget, to leave a comment just click on the purple box at the top of the post.

Vicki xx

Image credits: 1. 2. 3.

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  1. KPL says:

    I refuse to leave my house without my lashes getting their usual layer of mascara… I feel completely naked without it! I also frequently frustrate my bfriend by spending 20mins deciding what to wear to go to Sainsburys. I am not one for popping down to the shop looking like ive just grabbed whatever was on the top of the washing pile..

    However, behind the safety of my front door, im never more comfortable than when in my (less than glam) pjams which has on more than one occassion been a suprise for those knocking on the door trying to sell me something(!)..

    While a big fan of slobbing around when im at home, I love the feeling of freshly applied makeup and a new outfit :)

    K x

    • Vicki DeBlasi says:

      Thank KPL! Although, you have forgotten to mention your fluffy socks which i know for a fact are the first thing you put on when you get into your house!

  2. I can completely relate to this post Vicki and thank you so much for sharing! When you work for yourself and from home it is so easy to fall in to the routine of not making an effort and after a while this does effect your motivation! I totally underestimated the inspiration I got from expressing myself through my appearance and now I’ve realised how important it is for my confidence & creativity to as you’ve said so well ‘dress for myself’!! xx

    • Vicki DeBlasi says:

      Thanks Nicole – great to hear your thoughts on this. I’ve really surprised myself in the past few months with what an impact my clothes and appearance has on my mood and productivity. Heres’s to dressing just for us! x

  3. My attitude to clothes gradually changed when I came to live in the UK. Having grown up in Milan in a family of fashionistas (no kidding! you should see my dad’s wardrobe!), I loved the freedom London gave me to be more relaxed and experimental with my clothes, so I gradually slipped into a routine of dressing overly casual, something that I really struggled to get rid of (exacerbated by the fact that I’ve always had jobs allowing me to dress however I liked!).
    Self-employment has also made a bit worse, to the point that sometimes my husband would come back after a day’s work to find me with my hair still undone.
    As summer approached, I decided to try and fight the urge of wearing tracksuits all they long, as I’ve realised that if I wear ‘proper’ clothes I actually achieve more, as well as feel better about myself.
    So I’m now making more of an effort, and try to be the kind of girl I have always been when I was in Milan!

    • Vicki DeBlasi says:

      Hi Elisabetta, thank you so much for your comment. It’s really interesting to hear the cultural influence in here and I totally agree that wearing “proper’ clothes has such a huge impact on how you feel and what you can achieve.

  4. Michele says:

    Ha.. This post is great. My office is at the back of a cloakroom. It’s dark and no one but me can fit in it or see me but my computer and I was just thinking yesterday morning shall I continue to wear fab frocks and high heels for only my computer to see?

    I now think I shall!… =)